Hold Me Back Podcast: Grades

In this immensely emotional and raw episode, Ash and Aidan openly and honestly tackle a topic that’s caused turmoil in their own household, and is a daily dinner table topic for millions of families – Grades. All in this week’s episode of Hold Me Back. Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, and your other favorite podcast platforms.

• Episode Summary & Player
• Show Notes
• Hold Me Back Summary

Grades

In this immensely emotional and raw episode, Ash and Aidan openly and honestly tackle a topic that’s caused turmoil in their own household, and is a daily dinner table topic for millions of families – Grades. Ash and Aidan candidly share their struggles and failures in hopes that other families can benefit from their experiences. In doing so, they openly skewer the sensibility of nearly every commonly held convention on grades, and propose a robust set of nine principles they believe can be a framework from which parents and kids can find harmony when it comes to navigating grades. This episode covers everything from GPAs to college aspirations. Here’s a small sample of what you will hear in this episode:

• Why has this been such an emotional episode to record?
• How good are parents at objectively assessing their children’s academic capabilities?
• Why did tutoring help Aidan in math so much?
• What will he do if he doesn’t get into the school he wants?
• Should parents check their kids’ grades?
• How does getting a B impact Aidan and his peers?
• The ElDifrawi’s 13 Rings of Hell
• Aidan & Ash’s 9 Principles for Harmony on Grades

Who was more convincing: Aidan or Ash? Vote at the bottom of this post.

Enjoy the show! Check out the show notes below for much more detail.

Show Notes

• Intro to Grades
• [0:00] This episode of Hold Me Back is brought to you by Motto. Get started with Motto at Aspen Dental or MottoAligners.com
• [1:37] Welcome to Hold Me Back
• [1:46] Meet Aidan (Gen Z) & Ash (Gen X)
• [2:01] Boomers
• [2:11] Where did this interview come from?
• [3:08] Why has this been such an emotional episode to record?
• [5:17] Podcast
• [6:06] Psychologists
• [8:24] Why did Ash & his wife have a conflict about Aidan’s grades?
• [10:43] Tutor
• [15:12] What’s the impact of grades on parents & kids?
• [18:02] Socioeconomic Status
• [18:25] Did therapy help Ash & his wife work out their issues on grades?
• Research & Debate Pt 1: Tutoring
• [19:39] The Chicken or the Egg
• [20:54] “The Impressive Effects of Tutoring on PreK-12 Learning: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis of the Experimental Evidence“
• [27:15] Why did tutoring help Aidan in math so much?
• [28:01] How good are parents at objectively assessing their children’s academic capabilities?
• [30:42] 9 Box
• [30:57] The Brady Bunch
• [31:20] HR (Human Resources)
• [33:43] Hold Me Back Podcast #3: Youth Sports – You Think This Is a Game?
• [35:31] Mental Trauma
• [35:46] This episode of Hold Me Back is brought to you by Motto. Get started with Motto at Aspen Dental or MottoAligners.com
• Research & Debate Pt 2: Mental Health
• [37:14] Mental Illness
• [37:35] “The New Parental Obsession: Checking Kids’ Grades Online“
• [38:04] Anxiety, Depression
• [40:37] COVID-19
• [43:14] “Happiness and Academic Achievement: Evidence for Reciprocal Causality“
• [44:22] “Because I’m Happy“
• [44:37] GPA (Grade Point Average), Standardized Tests
• [47:42] Income
• [48:00] “Here’s how much your high school grades predict your future salary“
• [49:24] Street Smarts
• [50:04] EQ (Emotional Quotient)
• [50:45] IQ (Intelligence Quotient)
• [51:19] Google
• [52:37] “Do College Grades Predict Future Success?“
• [53:08] Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll Be by Frank Bruni
• [53:37] The University of Chicago (UChicago)
• [54:04] McKinsey & Company
• [56:18] Goldman Sachs, Consulting
• [58:03] What will Aidan do if he doesn’t get into the school he wants?
• Research & Debate Pt 3: Parents
• [58:41] Should parents check their kids’ grades?
• [1:02:48] Texting, Social Media
• [1:03:23] Hold Me Back Podcast #6: Do Not Disturb: On Parents, Teens, and Privacy
• [1:04:12] “To Check or Not to Check? The Pros and Cons of Checking Your Child’s Grades Online“
• [1:06:42] Growth Mindset vs. Fixed Mindset
• [1:07:03] The Gift of Failure by Jessica Lahey
• [1:09:04] Family Therapist
• [1:09:40] Identity Crisis
• Research & Debate Pt 4: The Grand Debate
• [1:14:34] How does getting a B impact Aidan and his peers?
• [1:17:14] The ElDifrawi’s 13 Rings of Hell
• [1:20:21] “Grade grubbing: when parents cross the line“
• [1:21:42] Aidan & Ash’s 9 Principles for Harmony on Grades
• [1:23:30] 1. Know thy self
• [1:25:50] 2. Know your grade equation
• [1:29:44] 3. Confront Reality
• [1:32:03] 4. Guaranteed Success
• [1:34:42] 5. Build a personalized & detailed plan
• [1:36:53] 6. Establish rules around checking your kids’ grades
• [1:42:56] 7. Have multiple plans for success
• [1:43:45] 8. Adapt & adjust grades based on mental health
• [1:45:06] 9. Embrace the suck
• [1:48:27] Thank you for listening! Follow Hold Me Back on HoldMeBack.com
• [1:48:37] Who was more convincing: Aidan or Ash? Vote below